The Unashamed Introvertish Girl Blog

As I scrolled through my three social networks this afternoon, partly upset because I was experiencing writers block, I could not help but notice the tremendously growing emphasis that society has put on appearance.

It's like a top priority, rule and requirement now to look perfect at all times. I am NOT saying that you should not take pride in how you look, appreciate the beauty that God has blessed you with or have fun with style.

I'm not challenging anyone, trying to make anyone feel bad, or prove anyone wrong, but I am questioning a dangerous concept: superficiality.

It means on the surface, exterior, and a synonym I found was half-baked. Not really sure why half-baked is a synonym, but you can analyze that later.

Society's insane obsession with looking good has driven many women and girls to step outside of the covering of modesty and begin to sell themselves short, allowing everyone to see everything or enduring unhealthy and degrading hardships all in an attempt to look good. Of course, as young ladies we all obsess over our beauty from time to time, and we love to look good, but where’s the limit?

What is this? What's the point? Is it the fear of not being considered good looking? Is it the need to keep up with everyone else because they’re doing it? Do those who choose to do it really think it is okay? Is it necessary, in this day in age, to lose a little self-respect in order to gain a little societal-respect?

Those are just a few questions that come to mind when I reflect on the platform on which we place appearance. I refuse to tear those down who do this. I just wonder why. By the way, we build each other up here, not tear each other down.

There are two different points I'm touching on here: society's demand that we must look extremely good at all times, and the new bare it and share it online craze.

Now that we've established that, I'll give my take on it. Obsessing over external appearance and/or baring it and sharing it are not necessary to be beautiful or to look edgy, or whatever the new slang word for looking good is.

Be free today, and not bound by society’s superficial definitions of beauty. Like one of my favorite rappers Lecrae says “If you live for their acceptance, you’ll die from their rejection.”

The most beautiful people I know don't have to do any of that, yet they glow. Their beauty spills from their insides, blends with their outsides and creates an overall, completely and truly beautiful person. When it all comes down to it, beauty doesn't really have that much to do with looks.

It's more about what you put out, from your insides than what you decorate your outsides with.

Beauty is multidimensional.

Vigilantly,

Unashamed Introvertish Girl

Remember me?

I was there. Before you let a million people, dress you up and dress you down with words. Before you began to see yourself the way those who misunderstood you saw you. Before you forgot who you were. Remember me?

Today I want to talk to you about self-perception. Self-perception is one of the most powerful things on this earth. It has lead people to go on to do great things such as end poverty, and convince entire nations to be at peace with one another. It has also lead people to plummet into downward spirals of violence, drugs and misery.

Self-perception has the power not only to affect and change you, but to change the entire world. It is indeed powerful. I’m not gonna lie to you guys, and I’m not gonna water anything down. My self-perception is heavily rooted in my faith.

I’m a follower of Jesus.

Sometimes we all forget our self-value and self-worth. Some of us may have never really been acquainted with it. You may never have low self-image problems. I don’t know.

This is a threat especially to introverts and the mysteriously distinctive shy population. Oftentimes we don’t talk. We may not come around much either. But when we do talk, it may not be a lot. And when we do come around, we might not say anything. So, and?

We are not like most of the extroverted population. I love you guys, and I have nothing against you, just to be clear. But right now I’m talking to the introverts and anyone curios, open-minded and/or kind enough to listen. That would be anyone reading this right now (you).

People oftentimes don’t know us, but a lot of people are very convinced that they have us figured out. They think they know us so much so that they have the audacity to talk about us. And give other people the run down on who we are.

The things they say can be general and unassuming. But oftentimes they are racked with details about how we are cold, or aloof, or arrogant or unstable we are. I am not trying to be negative. Negativity is not a friend of mine.

I know these things because I have heard them. I’m not making this up.

So introverts, demure, how do you respond? I hope you don’t let it get to you. I hope that you’re not listening to the point where you think you’re this wrongly made or wrongly placed on this earth person.

Because you’re not. You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). You’re also royalty (1 Peter 1:29)! You are sons and daughters of the King.

I cannot say that I have found my self-worth, if I am not looking for it in Christ. Knowing that I am a child of God helps me to remember who I truly am.

Otherwise, I’m lost. So that’s my secret. I just thought I’d share it with you all. In case you forgot who you really were.

With Knowledge of Who I Really Am,

Unashamed Introvertish Girl

Good Day to All Readers,

The high you were on from all the presents, all the praise, all the parties, and all the speeches about how much potential you have has just died down completely. You graduated from high school. You graduated almost two years ago actually. You even finished your first year of college. You met so many great people you feel like a socializing genius. Now you are a sophomore and you are looking 20 right in the face. Where did the time go you may ask yourself smiling and shaking your head in nostalgic satisfaction. But wait, you have an even better question. Where did the people go?

You look around your well stocked dorm, full of essentials that only a second year student would specially know they need, and then you go from satisfied, to a little puzzled, to downright confounded. What?

For those of you who don’t know, the sophomore slump affects students every year. I just conveniently happened to fall into that category, and as a result, I get to offer personal advice on it.

It all started a few hours after my parents left to drive back home after helping me unpack for my second year of college. I was so at ease packing, and ordering books off of Amazon. “Please, I got this. I know what I’m doing,” was my attitude for the majority of the summer. I did not even start packing until about four days before I left.

I have lived here for 32 weeks. I know what to expect. I was a little over assured about a very weighty aspect of the revered and beloved college experience…socialization.

During my first year of college, several things were different. One, I lived on a “community floor” which means we all had to apply to live on this specialized floor with the desire to continually pursue and partake in the major aspect that we had in common. Ours was community service. Two, I was in a freshman mentoring program where I was able to learn the ins-and-outs of college from willing and helpful upperclassmen. And finally, three, everyone is extra nice to freshman, at least at my university they are.

I was now a sophomore and I just knew something was different. I just could not put my finger on it until one of the biggest days of the semester so came, Game Day.

I am not a football expert, but I love football games, and have developed a great sense of school spirit and support of all of my schools’, previous and present sports teams. I think it all started when I joined the pom squad in high school, but that’s another story.

Anyway, game day had arrived and guess who did not have anyone to go with.

I do not recall games starting this early last year, and I don’t think they did. It was the first weekend of school, and concurrently Labor Day weekend. A lot of my friends went home, and the others, I never really went to games with. Besides, it was still extremely early in the school year, and I did not want to overwhelm anyone who may have still been settling in. I usually went with my floormmates, who traveled to games in masses, and made sure everyone knew that a group or two was going over to the stadium.

My floormmates were mostly freshman who had spent days together in orientation, and upperclassmen with set groups of friends. I thought about asking several people if I could tag along with them but only ended up asking one person. She was home for the weekend. School colors filled the streets leading to my school’s football stadium, faces were painted, pictures were taken, tickets were collected, cheerleaders cheered, the football players made their huge, grand season opening appearance, and I was not there to see any of it.

Before the little violinist in the back of your brain begins to play, stop. I want you to know that as an introvert, and a somewhat demure girl, this was a learning experience for me. It allowed to realize several things about myself. I won’t tell you those things because they are different for everyone. It was a defining moment. No, this is not a college essay entrance exam, it is a part of my real life.

I hope that this encourages you by demonstrating that hard times really do have a purpose. I also hope that it helps you to keep the next person in mind when you’re having a good time. This makes me want to ensure that I always treat others as generously as possible, when I’m having a good time, and even when I’m not, so that they can have a good time too.

With New Self-Revelations,

Unashamed Introvertish Girl

p.s. Don’t worry guys; I felt this way only for the first few weeks. It gets better, but I’ll tell you about that later.

Stay tuned for Track#4. It’s called Remember Me.

Good Day Readers,

I think we all should occasionally scare ourselves. Scaring yourself means doing something so remarkably outstanding that you get nervous because you know you did good. This something is something you never thought you would do, always knew you should have done, but never did…until now. I plan to scare myself this semester. I can think of all the times I scared myself, and what happened afterward. I was never the same. I was always a bit more fearless and a lot more confident. A lot of times, when we’re young, we have adults, and other mature individuals along the way to help us scare ourselves. These are people who care enough about you to make you scare the heck out of yourself. I can remember when I was younger and I used to try to scare some of my younger cousins, who are now all preteens or teenagers. I did not have any younger siblings, and for some reason, I thought this was so much fun and the most hilarious thing ever. I would hide in my grandmother’s living room and wait to hear little footsteps while simultaneously trying with everything within me to hold back laugher. When the moment was juuust right and the little footsteps turned into a wandering little person I would jump out and make a loud rarwing noise and the little person would then scream, run and jump before breaking out into laughter. We both laughed at the end.

As my younger relatives got older and wiser I was no longer able to find an obvious little hiding space and yell out a nonsensical onomatopoeias like “rarw.” It was no longer scary and I stopped doing it.

The same thing happens when it comes to the serious matters of life. When we get older, we become more responsible for who we are. We can no longer depend on people such as parents, teachers, and mentors to scare us into taking a chance at positive opportunities that come our way. We have to push ourselves. Of course it is possible to have people around that love you enough to push you, but the older you get the more this is something that you really have to want on your own. It’s very likely that you’re an introvert if you’re reading this. But don’t let that stop you from living, breathing and gracing this world with your God-given gifts and talents. Scare yourself. I plan to do this more often, and when I do, I’ll probably tell you about it. One of the last times I scared myself, I ended up talking to an award winning Washington, DC news anchor by email, and conducting an online interview with her. I was really scared before I contacted her and thought about calling the whole thing off. But I didn’t and she was very happy to assist me with my pursuit to become a broadcast journalist-yes, a broadcast journalist. As a demure, introverted broadcast journalist, I’ll probably be scaring myself for the rest of my life. You can do it. Don’t let unhealthy, perceptions of yourself stop you from being great and who you ARE destined to be.

With Some New Ideas for Scare Tactics,

Unashamed Introvertish Girl

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